When I was in college, I always
heard this line from one of my fave teacher, I’m not going to mentioned his
name as I know I have followers from my college buddies and it will damage my
name bwahahahaha… kidding!!! Well, perhaps, no one really understand the style
of teaching and discipline because he is indeed cruel but for one, such kind of
approach had thought me to be always prepared and be good in everything I do,
he was like the Simon Cowell of our school, he do not hesitate to speak his
mind even if it hurt you down to your bones…..
So going back to the topic, I
never understood why he keeps on saying “SOMETIMES WE HAVE TO BE CRUEL TO BE
KIND” every end of his class but now, I really do!!
I’ve been working my whole life
after graduation been into different companies but one thing is common in my
experience is the “ABUSE of Goodness” …yep!! We all have that goodness in our
heart as we are all created equal with emotions and we also have that tendency
to abuse others especially when you feel they’re very nice ( ahem….!!! Have you???)
,
I once, had an officemate who is
newly hired in the company and at that moment, I feel that I have to extend my
help to her since, we both are in the same country and I’ve been in the same
situation when I was just starting in the company, so I offer to drive her home
and from then is history.
I’ve offer her once and it
continue to every day and whenever she wants and eventually, asked me to take
her as well in the morning to come to work for the reason she could not find
any transportation,(by the way, the company is giving her allowance to pay for the transportation)
at first I feel it’s ok to help because she needed that but sooner than I
thought, I’ve been abused, I was in denial, telling myself it’s ok but in my heart
I’m in total disbelief wanting her to just vanish!!! I do not have that courage
to tell her that I’m not comfortable with the situation (I know, I’m
pathetic!!!)
Until one day, while giving her a
ride home she started story telling about her family and her kids and end up
asking me a favor to barrow some cash…. (Can you believe it??!) , she was just
1 month in the company, having a free ride and now, she wanted to barrow
money???! At that moment, the only lines
I can remember is “ SOMETIMES you have to be cruel to be KIND”, it gives me the
strength to just let go of my emotions and immediately say NO to her and
honestly, it feels really really really good!!!
For the first time in my life, I
feel free and not obligated to always be good to others, I’m not saying we have
to be literally cruel but find that balance and learn to say NO when it is
needed, BE CRUEL TO BE KIND!! And guess,
what happen to me and my officemate, we become normal officemates with no
commitment, hi and hello is enough and I can deal with that all my life!!! Period!!
Being nice is a commitment to
stay the same, it’s a process of long patience and believing in one solid
golden rule: “Don’t do unto others, what others don’t want to do unto you” but always
always always find that balance in your heart and in your
mind, learn to say NO when it is needed…
TILL THEN… HAVE A GREAT DAY
EVERYONE!! AND REMEMBER TO BE CRUEL TO BE KIND!!
